Sunday, April 6, 2008

Spotter's Field Guide to the Common David Muse

The Common David Muse
(Muses angelias davidus)

The David Muse was first spotted in November of 2005, during the writing of Nikolai. His voice was clear and distinct, but he was originally mistaken for a Basic Luke Muse (muses angelias skywalkerus), as the writer in question was coming out of a Star Wars fan era. Later, upon a viewing of Love! Valour! Compassion!, the muse was clarified as having a great many John Glover-style behaviors and mannerisms.

Davids are always thinkers, planners and achievers. This muse is capable of referring to himself, unironically, as "the best mind of the twenty-first century."

Many of them have a slightly psycho- or sociopathic edge. The Inman variant is called The Butcher of Cairo and has been responsible for the deaths of over 50,000 people.

David muses are almost always atheists, unless they are supernatural beings.

: The David muse can range in age from eighteen to his sixties. He favors appearing in his late forties to early fifties. He's often short, always slim. He's always fair, often blond, and tends to wear his hair rather long.

Habitats: Variable. The Morganstern subspecies favors rural isolation, while the Inman variety requires an urban lifestyle.

Sexual Habits
: The David is one of the few completely gay muses. He is minimally functional with females but finds performance difficult. He is always well endowed, somewhere between "Oh wow, nice" and "holy cow, keep it away!" The late-period Inman variant is a eunuch. A capable switch, he is an amazingly sadistic top when required, or a delightfully playful bottom. Often has a taste for verbal abuse.

Birthdate: February 14.

Appearances and Aliases:

David Charles Inman: The Butcher of Cairo first appears in Nikolai as Nick's teacher and James's lover/body slave. David is legally owned under Old Testament law, and wears the earring in his upper ear to prove it. Speaks ten languages, holds two masters degrees and a doctorate. Has written twenty books. He has a deep affection for Tanis, whom he treats as his daughter, and a sweet bit on the side with Valerio, the driver and bodyguard. He is bitterly jealous and resentful of Nick.

Professor L. Morganstern: "Tuition Fees: The Devil" The professor runs a private college for 13 of the most talented young men in the world. The name is transparent. Appears human most of the time.

Erik "The Wheelman" Ezekiel: Cyberverse. CEO of Ezekiel InfoTech, one of the largest multinationals. Is wheelchair-bound after being brain-burned by The Technomancer. Has a number of runners working under him, called Immortals. They are mutilated and confined to life-support chairs.

William Meier: "Paying forfeits." Older wealthy southern man, with a handsome young lover. Voyeur. has a taste for kink.

Victor Williams: "Raising the Dead." History professor with a writer lover. His life is spinning out of control, so he submits to his lover, but things go much too far. Strong verbal abuse kink.

Nigel: Lord Edward series. Secretary to Lady Sarah, former lover of Lord Edward. Nasty, scheming and completely devoted to his Lady.

David: "Talk like a Pirate Day." A Kansas City hotel events coordinator with a younger, rather ill lover.

Usual companions
The benJedi twins, usually the David twin (aka James).
Hates the Nick muse in almost every universe.
The Dan muse, who is often his son or lover (or his lover pretending to be his son, as in Paying Forfeits)
The Zara muse, either as rival (Technomancer) or employer (Lady Sarah)
The Paul muse, most often in the Corban Ligatos incarnation
The Chris muse

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