Because it seemed appropriate

from Alive on the Inside

“Tonight, the eight o'clock Ten in One will be replaced by a live Passion Play. There will be no adult show. There will be another Passion Play tomorrow night and a special Sunrise Service on Easter.”

Nick flinched at the notion. He knew there was a hymn-sing and revival service every Sunday morning, but he'd never worked up the nerve to go. He just knew Elijah would throw him out because of Jacob. He gave the idea of a Passion Play some thought. He wasn't sure how they could stage it, since they had very few normal looking people among the crew. The hideous thought occurred to him that it would be a real crucifixion and Jacob would be starring.

He dismissed this as blasphemous and started building the four o'clock tip.

Eight o'clock found him in his usual spot at the back of the Ten in One tent, a little nervous. Giant white scrims had been set up everywhere. The old familiar story began, half rear-projection, half live-action. Elijah addressed the council of the Pharisees as the high priest, the others all just motion picture, but his timing so impeccable, Nick could almost believe they were real. Jene, looking all male,led in the donkey colt to recorded cheers of a throng projected on the scrims at the front.

Nick winced. Jacob was indeed on the donkey. It was going to be a real beating and a real crucifixion and the crowd was going to ooh and ah over the realism and never know they'd actually seen true torture.

Marv was commanding as Pontius Pilate. Nick watched each blow of the whip lay Jacob's back open. The twins, as Mary and Martha, clung to MingXia, dressed in red as Mary Magdalene, and wept. The blood flowed until Nick was sure Jacob couldn't take any more. When Jacob winced at a blow, he
knew it was getting too much.

The tent went dark and Elijah's voice, deep as thunder, narrated the next events. Nick didn't recognize the Roman who was beating Jacob as he staggered under the weight of the huge wooden cross on his back. Then he realized it must be Wolfgang, without the fur. The Phantasmagoria had gone all out for this show.

One of the women in the audience sobbed when a splash of blood hit her face and she smelled the bitter iron of it instead of the sticky sweetness of corn syrup. “It's real,” ran through the crowd at lightening speed.

Wolfgang and Jene, both in full armor, wrestled the cross to the ground and spread Jacob atop it. Nick couldn't watch and from the gasps in the crowd and a thud, he knew others found it just as hard.

The sound of the crudely forged iron nails breaking skin and tendon and small foot bones before thudding into wood sickened Nick. He fled backstage.

The crucifixion went on for an eternity. Jacob bled and writhed and cried out. Finally, he dropped limp, the crown of thorns spattering the front row with more blood. Jene and Wolfgang took him down, none too careful and handed his body to the twins and Mingxia who carried it to the part of the set designated as the tomb. They washed him and wrapped him in white cloth and with some help, got the rock in front of the entrance.

Nick came to the back of the tomb set and helped Jacob sit up, unwrapping his head in the process. He handed over a glass of water. Gently, he lifted the thorns off, puncturing one finger as he did.

“Jacob, are you going to be all right?” He poured another glass of water. After losing that much blood, blood which still seeped through the white cloth, Jacob would need a lot of fluids.

“I'm always fine.” The cold suspicion in Jacob's eyes hurt, but Nick knew he deserved it.

He bent in and kissed one of the shallower cuts, the one at Jacob's temple. “There is no adult show tonight. Come on back to the car and let me take care of you.” He offered a hand and picked up a heavy robe with the other. Jacob stood, exhaustion pouring off of him like the blood. Nick wrapped him in the robe and helped him back to the railcar.

Once inside, he sat Jacob on the sofa and poured more water, adding a shot of whiskey to this one. “Drink,” he said. He ducked into the head and came back with the basin and cloth he'd used in
February.

The girls had washed him, but Jacob had bled again on the walk over. This worried Nick. By now, he should be scabbed over, if not healed entirely.

He washed extra carefully around Jacob's forehead and scalp where the cruel thorns had bitten deep under Jene's crueler pressing. He unwrapped the linen from Jacob's hands and cleaned them, the nailprints in the wrists giving him an odd, twisty sensation in his stomach.

It was how he used to feel as a kid, during the gorier parts of fairy tales or looking at the pictures in his mother's family Bible. Old, full color illustrations of the people dying in the Flood while the Ark sailed serenely on, of Salome presenting the head of John the Baptist to her mother and yes, of the Crucifixion. It was the same odd tingle he had always gotten saying the Apostle's Creed at the words “Crucified, dead and buried.” He knew exactly what he wanted to do.

“Jacob...love. may I stay?”

The hope in his lover's eyes almost burned. “Please stay.”

Nick turned Jacob's hands palm up, washed away the blood and kissed the center of each. Jacob stroked his face, running a light thumb along his cheekbone. Nick took a deep breath and tongued the nail-prints in Jacob's wrists. He looked up with a shudder, terrified he'd overstepped himself.

Jacob pulled him up for a kiss. Nick met him, the taste of blood in his mouth—holy blood, his mind whispered—his passions higher than they'd been for months. He finished stripping away the robe and cloth.

Carefully, Nick washed his lover's back. The whip welts had closed and no longer poured out Jacob's life. He washed the blood from Jacob's legs and feet, kissing those holes too.

Finally, he started cleaning the cut in Jacob's side. Unable to help himself, he slipped four fingers into it, flat, as he imagined Doubting Thomas doing on that long ago day in Jerusalem.

“What do you need, my love?” he whispered.

Jacob opened one eye as if the eyelid weighed as much as the whole world. The exhaustion had not passed, but seemed to grow deeper. Nick wondered if Jacob would survive the next night's show.

Stuff

Oh look, I have a Blogger account.
Oh look. i remembered how to access it.

It's been a busy spring. 4 releases in 4 months. And working on more.

But all in all, it's going well enough.

I have no thoughts on this Maunday Thursday. Work eats me alive

Bane Of Humanity

When I hear John Boehner's name pronounced, this is the scene I see in my mind.

Stuff in progress

Done and Subbed:
Worth the Woe--Ravenous Romance's Rumpled Silk Sheets
Experiments--Cleis CARNAL MACHINES
Thigh to Thigh--Ace's Pain/Pleasure anth
Playing With Fire--Renaissance, Undead erotica
Between Despair and Ecstasy--Renaissance, Undead Erotica

Done
Looking Down the Road

Done but need rewrites
Long-Term
Dancing in the Black
On the Night Road
Swimming through the Net

In progress
untitled for Circlet's Like an Iron fist
Masquerade—Dec 1, 20K
Withycombe 2—50K min
Songs for Guitar and French Harp—Nov 30, 20K
Nick & Corban

A list of works in various stages of progress.

Stories.

Done and SubbedWorth the Woe
Experiments

Done
Profiteering
Looking Down the Road

Done but need rewrites
Long-Term
Dancing in the Black
Between Despair and Ecstasy/vampire apocalypse
On the Night Road
Swimming through the Net

In progress
Masquerade—Dec 1, 20K
Withycombe 2—50K min
Songs for Guitar and French Harp—Nov 30, 20K
Manhunt
The Algol 3 Disaster
untitled Flower Fairies
Fruits of Thine
Nick & Corban


On hiatus
Hot Delta nights
Dead Man's Wind
the time travel piece with Hermes
Uncanny Valley
Vampire apocalypse
Space vaudevillians
ghost lovers
hideous title
Rapture Horror
Adrien Origin story
David Origin story
Casting Couch Blues
Dark Angel
Rum Sodomy and the Lash
toads and diamonds
steampunk elf thing
Barbarossa's Bitch
Painting Blues City Red
Dirty Toes
Passion Hearts/Rainbow Hearts
Peregrine off High Barbary
Seasonal Make & Do books
Runic alphabet book
Gammon (lake monster)
Fissures (what lives under the ground)
Mystery of the Monkey God

Five Influences: Chain Male

I've seen this around and it looked like fun.
Chain-Male is my most recent release, from Amber Allure.


Five Influences:

1) Christian Brothers University

I worked for Christian Brothers for five years. Hence the choice of Interlibrary Loan Librarian for Chad. I actually did have to send a book to Truth or Consequences New Mexico, work late nights in the library, monitor computer use and work-study students. In my head, Chad works at CBU.

2) Lilies War

War of the Lilies is an annual event held in the center of the Kingdom of Calontir in June. (this means Kansas City MO) Each year features a different scenario, from Shires (small groups) vs. Baronies (larger ones) or Grand Tournament of Artisans to a Week of Henries or Laurels (those recognized for great crafting skill) vs. Pelicans (those recognized for great service).

Much of what Chad sees is akin to what one would see at Lilies: the merchant's row (most smaller events have ten merchants tops), the bardic, the fighting, including the castle battle. The Resurrection Castle Battle depicted in the story is strongly based on one I saw at my first Lilies War, back in 1990.

Most of Jace's gear is based on my own. I built the viking tent and the rope bed, helped build tables like his and owned one of those chairs.


3) VividCon

VividCon introduced me to the Xena episode "Lyre, lyre, hearts on fire" and the Joxer Dance. They start the Friday Night Dance party with it.

The video cannot be embedded, but click here


4) Waldo and Jen

Kind of together, actually. These ladies had a big influence on the scene where the guys go for breakfast. My sister Jen introduced me to a restaurant in KC called "First Watch" which is only open for breakfast and became the inspiration for "Early Shift." Waldo and I had lunch at a mediocre diner in Chicago and her potato pancakes made it in as Jace's order.

5) Gary "Hugh DePuy" Larson

Gary taught me to make chainmail.
All I've done is a bracelet and a dancing belt in simple four-in-one, but this gave me the starter background for Jace's hobby.

Work in Progress Wednesday

Untitled Flower Fairies

Kelig Raklray took another swing at the tree he was using for a pell. Maybe exercising on an empty stomach wasn't the smartest idea, but he could hardly sit around and wait to starve. There wasn't much for a fourth-rate swordsman's apprentice to do in the swamp.

He'd been wandering, more lost than anything, since his last master died in a battle with a Drasrt. There hadn't been anything left to bury of him. The humanoid lizards considered themselves the top of the food chain and humans a tasty treat.

Overcome by heat and hunger, Kelig slumped down in the sparse shade of a gnarled tree, his sword hanging limp and unregarded by his side. The moss dripping from its branches hung black and dead. The whole swamp had been like that, twisted and dying, the water sluggish and stagnant.

He felt a stab in his sword-arm above his elbow-cup. Oh Sun, not another. He slapped at the stab and felt warm blood, his own, wash over his hand. He wiped the remains of the giant mosquito off his glove and onto a patch of unwholesome-looking yellow grass. That was the sixth today. He had to get out of the swamp before nightfall or he wouldn't need to worry about finding food.

He sheathed his sword and reached up to take his helmet off when he saw something with wings coming at his face. Reacting on instinct, he swatted it.

Kelig was pretty sure giant mosquitoes didn't shriek. He wrenched his helmet off and wiped the sweat and hair from his eyes. Lying in the disgusting yellow grass was a tiny woman with purple wings.

“Oh sweet Sun,” he groaned. He took off the leather gloves and picked her up carefully, sliding one hand under her body. He had no idea how to revive a woman who was less than three inches tall.

He dug in his pack and found his last clean handkerchief. He folded it atop his well-worn leather gloves and laid her gently on it. His almost-empty waterskin still had a mouthful or two. He took one and got a drop of water on his smallest finger. He let it fall onto her face.



Tangle sputtered as the big, warm water ball enveloped her head. She gulped a mouthful and sputtered more, then sat up on the handkerchief. Her head ached and she fluttered her wings. One was still a bit bent. Getting smashed against a metal wall had not been in the Council briefing.

She stood up and looked up. And up. And up. Humans were enormous. She realized he'd built her a nest in his gloves.

“Can you hear me?” she called. Huge he might be, but he was also cute. The brief thought of Bud crossed her mind. Bud would think he was cute too.

“I can hear you. Are you all right? I'm sorry!” He looked so upset she tested her wings and fluttered up to his shoulder. He bent wing sent her drifting but she corrected. One arm wasn't moving right.

“I'm all right. I should have approached more carefully.” She was lying but she'd heal fast enough.

“I'm really sorry,” he said in a softer voice. “I was sweaty and in the helmet you looked like another giant mosquito.”

Tangle laughed. “You big meanie. Bloodsuckers aren't purple.”

“I know. You're really beautiful. I'm Kelig by the way. Kelig Ralkray, adventurer for hire.” He tried to sound impressive and it was all Tangle could do not to laugh again. Males had such an inflated sense of their own importance.

“Excellent. I want to hire you to kill the Lord Kalad and end his war with his sister which destroys the whole countryside.” She gestured around at the dying swamp. “The only problem is, I don't have anything to pay you with. Yet. Do you work for spoils?”

Kelig was shaking his head and staring at her. “Lord Kalad? You don't aim small do you, girl? Look, I'm barely trained. Most of that 'hero-for-hire' bluster is just that, bluster. “ He stared. “You're not all right.”

Tangle wobbled on her feet and he caught her before she could fall off his shoulder. With her good arm, she pulled out the spell-effect. “Find Thorn,” she told it. “Follow it,” she told Kelig. The dizziness and pain in her arm overwhelmed her.

Genre Trends I am seeing, and my predictions.

Pulling out my Cloudy Crystal Ball(tm):

Steampunk is peaking. We’re going to see a rash of it for about 2 years as the bandwagoners finally get to the shelves. Cyberpunk…not happening. Mythpunk/Bronzepunk, give it five more years.

Vampires are hot, but a lot of people are burning out. I give them 2-3 years before they return to perennial favorite status.

Werewolves are mostly over. Shapeshifters in general have about another year in non-wolf form.

Historicals…I foresee a rash of medievals because of the upcoming Robin Hood movie. There will probably be more than a few reworkings of that legend too (ahead of the curve again, me).

Pirates are over. They’re stuck back with highwaymen in the “decent seller, not trending.”

Zombies are peaking. They have about three more years. There are only so many ways to write them. They’re starting to get into romance and erotica, so as an SF/horror trend they are pretty much done.

Contemporaries, Cowboys and Cops are perennials. Always a strong seller. Historical westerns, not so much in the m/m genre. I don’t see them getting out of niche.

SF/Fantasy has always been risky in our genre. It’s got some potential, but I really don’t see it happening for another five to ten years.

Faeries and Nephilim are the things I’m seeing more of. I’m reading two books right now with Nephilim involved.

This is me, talking based on what i’m seeing from small presses and NY houses, and at the grass-roots level. We’ll see how right I am.

The Holy Fool

1 Corinthians 1, 27, "the weak things of the world hath God chosen that he may confound the strong."

Well, let folly be our cloak, a veil before the eyes of the Enemy! --Gandalf

A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have. --Roger Rabbit

It's April Fools today. It's also Maunday Thursday.
So, we're talking about Holy Fools.

Many faiths find the Fool a useful guise for a Teacher or Trickster.

Consider the musical GODSPELL. Jesus and his disciples are all portrayed as clowns. In the movie, he even wears big pompoms on his shoes.

(apologies for the Portugese subtitles)


But the teaching is given with laughter and received with joy, a thing missing in all too many churches and groups.

Here, it's set up to the point of even sounding like a vaudeville act:


We learn best when the lessons are entertaining. This is a well-known fact, to the point that the little people of the Sims 2 game learn best when they're enjoying themselves: painting, working on cars or watching cooking shows on TV. They don't want to sit and study out of a book, who does?

And the Holy Fool is a teacher, always.
SJ Tucker, Skinny White Chick, has Rabbit's Song about how Trickster was looking for teachers.


Who is the Fool?
He wears a different face for every faith but in every pantheon he serves three purposes:
Teacher/Redemptive Sacrifice
The Clown
The Bringer of Chaos

Whether Prometheus or Jesus or Raven, he loves humanity. He works to bring them knowledge and sometimes wisdom. Often, he provides people with a great treasure, the sun or fire. His good intentions may or may not work out. When the more powerful gods are angry, it is the Fool who intervenes on humanity's behalf, preventing complete destruction. And he pays the price, even to his own death or torment.

As the clown, Coyote and Bugs Bunny, Ananzi, the Pookas and Loki, The Fool plays jokes and tricks that always backfire, leaving him looking foolish but teaching something in the process.

But as Chaos, Loki, the Amadan, even the Joker and Randall Flagg are laughing at us as we scramble. This is the dark side of the trickster, the one who blows things up to enjoy the Boom, who is a psychopath. This is not the side of Loki that aided Thor in recovering his hammer, but rather the one that engineered Balder's death. This is the Ananzi who pretends to be dead and buried, but instead eats all the pea crop, leaving his family to starve. This one teaches us fear.


The Trickster and I have a dubious relationship. My husband is a devotee (under the Christian guise) and my baby girl insists Loki is her father because she was an oops, conceived when Loki overheard and laughed at me.

It has taken many years and much work on the part of the Trickster and his people in my life to even help me find my sense of humor. And every now and then I still have to shake my fist in the direction of Valhalla and say "Stop messing with my life!"

Following the Fool may take you right off the cliff, as in the Tarot card up there. But he'll be right beside you, handing you an umbrella and convincing you to fly.

For other posts in his blog tour:
http://www.angelakorrati.com/2010/04/01/drollerie-blog-tour-for-april-2010-foolery/

Writing to music

A lot of writers use music when they write. Stephen King credits the beginning of The Stand to The Eagles. Some can't write to music with lyrics at all.

Me, it varies. Sometimes, I create a whole play list. This is most common when writing a novel. Sometimes, it's a song or two. Sometimes, it's just one song to get me over a hump.

"Between Despair and Ecstasy" is a short story (that is being redone into a novel at the editor's request) about vampire hunters. There is a scene in a vampire nightclub. While I was writing this rather gruseome scene (one of several), I played Bauhaus' "Bela Lugosi's Dead" on repeat for about an hour. My family was ready to scream at the industrial drone.

While writing "Showdown at Yellowstone River," it was Marty Robbin's "Big Iron" and The Highwaymen's "Silver Stallion."

When we wrote Alive on the Inside, Naomi and I came up with a playlist that sort of followed Nick's journey out of closeted hyper-religious life into the carnival as the Pain King's lover.
Long Black train--Josh Turner
Entry of the Gladiators
Take it--Genitorturers
Strange Love--Depeche Mode
Closer--Nine Inh Nails
Personal Jesus--Depeche Mode
Pain--Three Days' Grace
Hurt So Good--John Cougar Mellencamp
Happiness in Slavery--Nine Inch Nails
Comfortably Numb--Pink Floyd

On the other hand, when writing Heart of a Forest, we had a much different style of music.

Overture (Whistle Stop) from Disney
Siul a ruhn--Skylark
Scarborough Faire--Sarah Brightman
She moved through the fair--Pentangle
Wild Mountain Thyme--3 Pints Gone
Ooo da Lolly--Roger Miller
May Queen--Heather Dale
Devil's Dance--Gil Shaham
Robin Hood and Maid Marian--Wallace House (an actual Child Ballad)
Everything I do--Bryan Adams
Love--The Disney version
Labyrinth Waltz--Kim Robertson
Circle of the Lustful--Medieval Baebes
Men in tights
Full Circle--Loreena McKinnett
Robin, the Hooded Man--Enya and Clannad

I find music gives me a pace to type to and the songs can set the tone for the writing.